Scared the Carp out of Me

Perhaps you have heard of spirit animals. While many identify themselves with one, my life was instead a reimagined menagerie.

My spirit bear would bare its teeth in wide ranges of anger. My spirit horse would lead me to run on distant shores. My spirit snake would sneak me past my garrulous neighbor who could endlessly speak about her arugula.

Their visitations ranged from sensible to senile.

After every production, my spirit pigeon made me feel a mere epigon. My spirit snail has slain my social schedule. But the newest, and perhaps worst, my spirit newt imparts a wetness to my armpits.

As you may sense, this regular spirit mestee has a self-esteem of a snibbed bison. My love life had the prospects of a male mantis.

Regardless, a lovely young lass had taken a liking to me.

Aside from animal spirit exceptions, our first date went as well as could be expected, but I was so nervous for our first kiss that when she puckered her lips, it scared the carp out of me.

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